The Wine Idiot Reviews: Fort Cellars Merlot, 2012 ($4.99)

The Wine Idiot Reviews: Fort Cellars Merlot, 2012 ($4.99)

You guys...we have a Wine Idiot first.

I threw out this bottle.




Whew. Had to get that out. I was super-disappointed. OK, so, full disclosure, I bought this wine because of the label. I was looking for something to throw in my cart, I haven't reviewed a ton of merlot, I had just reviewed a random French red and I thought it was California's turn. Hooboy, Fort Cellars. Did you let your state down.

It smells really fruity--like opening a jar of raspberry and blackberry jam. On the first sip, it's just--not good. It coats your mouth, and tastes a bit metallic. Any fruitiness is overwhelmed by this cheap-wine flavor. I valiantly wrote in my notes: "it's a little sour? I keep hoping it will get better but I don't think it will"... And the rest of the page is blank.

It's blank because I handed the glass to my mom and said, "hey what do you think of this wine?" She sipped it and made a horrific face and yelled, "OH GOD THAT'S GROSS."

So I gave up. And I REALLY wanted a glass of wine. I left the corked bottle by the stove for a couple days, thinking maybe I would use it for cooking. I did not.

I poured it down the drain.

trader joe's wine review bargain wine cheap fort cellars merlot 2012

What the bottle says: "Along the sloping hills of the North Coast wine region, old historic forts from California's frontier past still stand over the rolling vineyards. A testament to the rich history of these lands, the Fort Cellars 2012 Merlot's elegant cedar and cherry aromas accentuate its soft, full-bodied texture. On the palate, flavors of dark stone fruit and roasted hazelnut combine with subtle hints of French Oak, culminating in a smooth finish."

What the Wine Idiot says: Nope.

ABV: 13.9%

Who's responsible for this? "Cellared and bottled by DNA Vineyards, Ukiah, CA"

Do I need a corkscrew? Well, if you wanted to open it, yes you would need a corkscrew. But since you don't want to open You do not.

What do smarter people say about it? Steveo at Ain't Found a Good Title Blog had a slightly better opinion, but not by much: "There’s a hint of vinegar on the cork and a medium-dark ruby color in the glass.  The aroma of a crude red wine fills the air in the glass.  Adding to the impression of a crude red wine is the dryish mouth feel of tannins, eventually leaving a semi-arid climate on the roof of the mouth.   A more than bearable taste follows that.  This is a classic table wine.  A wine that’s not “refined” but ready for a tussle with a hearty bowl of stew and a chunk of bread torn from a long loaf.  How would it stand up to a bowl of chili?  The thought had never crossed my mind until now.   Probably very well."

Should I bring it to a friend's house? If you hate your friend.

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